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el loser
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Joined: 03 May 2003
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PostPosted: Sat Oct 04, 2003 10:25 am Reply with quoteBack to top

why is it that people feel they can come to the front door of someone's home and pass out flyers saying- not asking- that they should join their church?

church ladies said, not wrote:
oooo, you don't go to church? why not come to ours? go to church. it'll help you. what nice kitties. have a nice day! come to church!!

then the door closed. and they still were talking. rar!

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eddie_baby
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2003 8:39 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I find debating their theology tends to make them run (hehehehe).

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Uty
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2003 8:45 am Reply with quoteBack to top

They think they're doing something good, and at least they're not using that energy to do something they think is bad, like peeing on your flowers.

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eddie_baby
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2003 9:31 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Here's what to say to each group that may appear at your door:
If they say they're Baptist: "you are a Presbiterian" and can not accept their veiw of free will.

If they are Presbiterian: "you are Baptist" and can not accept their view of predestination.

If they are Jahova's Witnesses: you can not accept their view occult views and slam the door.

If they are Morman: I can not support a religion that endorses the practice of poligamy and slam the door. (if they are male and you are female, say I will not be your 3rd wife!)

If they are a non-denominational church say: I can not attend a chuch that has no defined theology.

If they are Uniterian: what is it exactly that you DO believe?

If they are Anglocan (Church of England.): I can not support a gay bishop.

If they are Methodist: your church's theology is built on works

If they are Luthern: I'm Catholic.

If they are Catholic: I can't support the pope.

Those brief sentances should end any conversation quickly.

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MajorKong
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2003 9:33 am Reply with quoteBack to top

eddie_baby wrote:
Here's what to say to each group that may appear at your door:
If they say they're Baptist: "you are a Presbiterian" and can not accept their veiw of free will.

If they are Presbiterian: "you are Baptist" and can not accept their view of predestination.

If they are Jahova's Witnesses: you can not accept their view occult views and slam the door.

If they are Morman: I can not support a religion that endorses the practice of poligamy and slam the door. (if they are male and you are female, say I will not be your 3rd wife!)

If they are a non-denominational church say: I can not attend a chuch that has no defined theology.

If they are Uniterian: what is it exactly that you DO believe?

If they are Anglocan (Church of England.): I can not support a gay bishop.

If they are Methodist: your church's theology is built on works

If they are Luthern: I'm Catholic.

If they are Catholic: I can't support the pope.

Those brief sentances should end any conversation quickly.


The quickest way that I found was "SIC EM, PACKET!". Twisted Evil

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John Scoggin
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eddie_baby
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2003 9:42 am Reply with quoteBack to top

dog's that are big (or at least sound it) are great deterants for scores of solictiors Twisted Evil

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Uty
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2003 9:53 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I once got rid of J. Witnesses by saying (truthfully) that my life had been saved by a blood transfusion when I was an infant, and I have difficulty buying into a life philosophy which asserts I should not exist.

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BrianW
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2003 9:56 am Reply with quoteBack to top

eddie_baby wrote:
If they are Jahova's Witnesses: you can not accept their view occult views and slam the door.


Somethingawful had a goldmine on what to do when witnesses knock on your door. My favorite was say something like, "I'm sorry but I'd feel really bad joining the witnesses since I never actally saw Jesus do anything."

And besides, I don't believe God plays Keno

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eddie_baby
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2003 10:03 am Reply with quoteBack to top

that's funny. Anytime that one of them quotes that passage, tell them to keep reading and they'll find the number to be much greater than 144k.

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BrianW
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2003 10:10 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Ugh, now I have to go hunt down that passage.

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eddie_baby
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2003 11:10 am Reply with quoteBack to top

http://www.biblegateway.com/cgi-bin/bible?passage=REV+7&language=english&version=NIV&showfn=on&showxref=on
here's a link to Chaper 7, the part about the 144k and then the "number no one could count."

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BrianW
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2003 11:55 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Awesome Ed. Very cool stuff.

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eddie_baby
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2003 12:00 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Don't ya love it how you can see it in 10 or so different verisions? I also like their comentary on it. They do a pretty good job referencing related profetic scripture and avoid trying to make it fit with just one donominations view of it. (Especially the world is going tomorrow people).

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