You speakie English!?

Posted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 1:29 pm

I hate my newest business contact. Every time he emails me it is nothing but garble and run-on sentences. Judging by his name, if he is from a foreign country, it is England. I do not employ perfect grammer but I do expect effective communication. I have eBuddies from Brazil, China, the Netherlands, and Russia who communicate effectively in English. So why can't this asshole? Get the fuck out of hospital IT or get an education.

Posted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 2:31 pm

Uty wrote:

...I do not employ perfect grammer ...

God help me, but I couldn't stop laughing...

Posted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 2:48 pm

Glad I could brighten you're day!

Posted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 3:01 pm

Amen Uty. Though sometimes, just sometimes, the brain/language barrier is hysterical. Take for example the following real email exchange snippets that took place 4 days ago between my colleagues:

Original text in a helpdesk ticket:

Quote:

Hola:

Ultimamente el mail de Sanela nos ha entregado errores y ha hecho cosas extrañas. Hoy por ejemplo aparecio un cartel en rojo que no nos dio el tiempo a ver, desaparecio solo, y luego de esto habian quedado todos los mails de la semana pasada en el trash. Este cartel le ha aparecido varias veces, pero no he podido nisiquiera verlo, porque cuando me voy ya se fué.
Pueden chuequear que est su base bien y hacerle un mantenimiento.

Gracias

An imperfect misplaced attempt at being helpful by a helpdesk guy:

Quote:

Translation from Microsft Word:
Last the mail of Sanela has given errors to us and has made things strange. Today for example aparecio a red poster in that did not give the time to see us, desaparecio single, and after this habian been left all mails of the week last in trash. This poster has appeared him several times, but I have not been able nisiquiera to see it, because when I go away already it went. They can chuequear that est its affluent base and do a maintenance to him.

Response from one resident wise alec in London:

Quote:

when we ask for a translation before assigning tickets to us, we mean by someone who actually speaks both languages.

Translation by an actual Spanish speaker:

Quote:

Basically he is asking that we double check the health of that person’s mail database since they have recently experienced strange occurrences. The latest were a few error messages that quickly popped up on the screen and quickly disappeared before they could read what it stated. Additionally, they experienced a strange issue where last week’s email was moved to the trash.

The finale:

Quote:

that helps. Google didn't do a very good job with this, and my own Spanish stops somewhere around "dos cerveza por favor" Wink

Posted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 4:00 pm

mmmmm cerveza

Posted: Fri Dec 14, 2007 10:00 am

New client, same old shit. How the hell anyone who writes at a fifth grade level lands a professional job is beyond me.

Posted: Fri Dec 14, 2007 10:22 am

Check the contacts knees for calluses? Wink

Posted: Sat Dec 15, 2007 9:54 am

Writing ability does seem to be shockingly rare. This cuts across all generations as far as I can tell.

I think things would be a lot better if people would read what they had just written. I know I could spare myself weeks of humiliation if I could catch the minor character transpositions I make when writing to Brian or Maz on IM...

Posted: Sat Dec 15, 2007 11:46 am

I've got a fantastic grammar and modern usage book by Bill Walsh (thanks tig!). He says that one of the things that separates great writers from mediocre ones is the ability to reread your own writing from a third-person point of view and see it as a new reader would see it. This helps you rewrite sentences and such to avoid ambiguity and other silliness. Granted, if you can't spell to begin with, this probably won't help.

Posted: Wed Dec 24, 2008 2:36 pm

erait wrote:

Quote:

that helps. Google didn't do a very good job with this, and my own Spanish stops somewhere around "dos cerveza por favor" Wink

that should be "dos cervezas" if you want two.